Good Bye to My Little Buddy and Best Friend!!!

 By Craig Dahlke/Webmaster GCCCA.com

My cat, Snowball, was put to sleep today (one year ago). It is the last time I will ever see him. We loved each other in the best way we could...I lost my best friend forever...

Upon arriving home from work back in the June of 1988, I came into the house and saw a white kitten in the kitchen. My son was standing there waiting for me to come home to see my reaction. I looked at him and said, “What is that?”  He said it’s a cat.

I said, “I know it’s a cat, but whose is it?”  He said, “It’s ours.”  I asked him where the kitten came from and he replied that it was at the back door wanting to eat. I reminded him of our previous cat (black as midnight which is how he got his name ‘ Midnight ’) had died not so long ago and maybe we shouldn’t have any more pets for awhile. We discussed the situation and both agreed that if the kitten was still here after a week, we could keep him after we checked with the animal shelter to see if a little white kitten has been reported lost.

Little Snowball (he was an angora and pure white) was at the door when I got home from work every evening.  I was feeling sorry for him because we were only feeding him a dish of milk for a couple of days. I happened to stop at McDonalds on the way home from work one evening and bought hamburgers for dinner.  Upon arriving home, the little white kitten was there as usual and I cut up a hamburger for the kitten, which he ate.  The next day found me stopping at a pet store buying a couple cans of cat food.

After a week the little white kitten was still at our home door waiting to become a member of our family. I called the humane society to see if anyone had reported a white kitten missing but no one had. An ad was placed in the newspaper in the lost and found pets section but no one called.

About six months after Snowball had become a member of our family, I was working in the garage on my car and had the garage door open.  A lady walked up my driveway and said loudly, “Hi Sweetheart, I haven’t seen you in so long. I just want to hold you.” I looked at her (she was beautiful) and knew I had never seen her before and thought this is my lucky day. As I stood waiting dumbfounded, she continued to walk up the driveway, stooped over and picked up Snowball who was sitting next to me. I didn’t know Snowball had somehow snuck out of the house without my knowledge.

She explained that this was her cat and she acquired him while she and her husband were driving down a street and saw a sign that said, “Kittens – free to a good home.” There were two kittens and she took this one to be a companion for her 9-year old cat.  She explained that from day one, this new kitten would eat and drink from the bowls designated for her older cat and they just didn’t get along. She only had this kitten for two days when it ran away.  She thought it had probably been run over by a car.

I told her that I have only had Snowball for six months and said she could have him back. She literally begged me to keep Snowball because he wouldn’t get along with her existing cat and she would just have to give him to someone else.  We both had a good laugh over trying to give Snowball back to each other.  She thanked me for taking him in and giving such good care to him and again pleaded with me to keep him.

One of the many functions in my work life is to design technical systems and write training manuals for proprietary computerized systems. After a long day at work, I would spend my evenings developing system design and writing the accompanying manuals. In time, as home PC’s became more advanced, I began connecting to a work server from home. I would work for hours each night on my home PC and my little buddy ‘Snowball’ would always be there lying next to me, if not directly in my lap. When I went to bed, he would jump up on his little blanket lying at the foot of my bed or lay next to me.

Over the years I would take Snowball up to my property in Traverse City . We would venture out on my boat together running at 60 mph or spend a quiet day fishing. When I cut the lawn at home, I would put his harness on and tie him to a backyard tree. When I stopped cutting the lawn to take a break, he would cry until I came back out with him to finish cutting.

Snowball was an indoor cat and had the roam of the house but would lie next to me whenever I stopped to read, take a quick nap or watch TV. He would follow me everywhere. He was always at the door when I came in from the garage to greet me. Most every night, we’d play together. I would use one hand and see if I could quickly touch his side, his whiskers, his head or one of his paws without him touching me with one of his paws. He was always faster than me and he would always win. We played this game for years. Usually, I would stand at the bottom of the basement stairs and he would be several steps up.

Snowball was a beautiful angora and had hair about five to six inches long on his midriff. I would have to make an appointment for him to have his hair cut twice a year or he would rip it out with his teeth every spring or fall when new growth occurred and have it all over the house. Over the years we became inseparable within the house. I used to get a kick out of him jumping on me when I was lying down or keying on my PC.  On many occasions he would jump on the keyboard and the PC would do strange things depending upon the keys he accidentally jumped on.

Two days ago, I hadn’t seen Snowball all day. During the evening while I was updating a Web site, Snowball came crawling across the floor to me using only his front paws. He wasn’t able to walk using his back legs.  I carried him downstairs where his litter box was kept and I set him in it. I laid a blanket on the floor and gave him his food and water. I pulled a chair up next to him where he would eat and drink only when I held his food and water bowl for him. I left a light on for him in the basement and went to bed on the first floor. During the night, I heard him crawling into my bedroom where he continued to crawl under my bed.

Yesterday, I carried Snowball down to the basement again and laid him on his blanket. Again, he would only eat or drink when I held his food and water bowl for him. I spent a long time with him and told him we were going to the vet tomorrow to see what was wrong with him. When I went to go upstairs to go to bed he tried to follow me and could only crawl a few feet before collapsing. I carried him upstairs and laid him next to me on my bed. I petted Snowball for a long time and he looked at me the whole time with sad eyes. During the night, being unable to jump off the bed, he fell on the floor and again crawled under the bed to sleep.

Like the last mornings, I had to move my bed to pick up Snowball and laid him down in another room. After getting his carrying cage, he was still laying down on his side unable to move. We went to the vet and I explained to them that he couldn’t walk on his two back legs.

The vet explained to me that she would take x-rays, a blood sample and perform other tests to try to determine why my cat is unable to walk on his two back legs. The vet also explained that if it was a spinal problem she would make an appointment with a neurologist who would have to perform surgery on the spine. She explained the costs to me which would probably be over a $1000 for the operation. She asked me if I was willing to pay that much and I assured her I was.

I sat waiting about 15 minutes for the test results with many visions going through my head. When the door opened, she brought Snowball back in. She showed me the x-rays which showed Snowball’s heart and lungs to be fine. His rear bones in his legs were not broken and the bone structure was good. She said his bladder was full and so was his stomach. I explained that he ate and drank well last night but hasn’t used his litter box for a few days. She showed me the x-rayed pictures of his lungs that had dark mass which she said could be leukemia. The problem was in the spine which was likely the cause of his problems.

Then she expressed her real concern. She told me one of the tests that were taken was for ‘deep pain.’ She said he is a very gentle cat and would normally be able to take more pain than a hyper cat. The process she used was to use a hemostat (an instrument like pliers) to purposely inflect pain within each of Snowball’s back legs. She compared it to me being pinched extremely hard to see if I had feelings. She said if she did it to me, I should react with some emotion. When this test was performed on Snowball, there was no reaction in his right leg and almost no reaction in his left leg.

In essence, he is a paraplegic being paralyzed in both rear legs. She believed the problem was caused from Spinal Nova which is a cancer of the spine. She stated that there was no deep pain in either leg and even a gentle cat like him should feel some type of inflected pain.

The vet stated that she could call the neurologist to make an emergency appointment but mostly due the lack of deep pain, she would have to caution the neurologist with a guarded opinion. She told me that surgery could be administered but the chances of Snowball being able to use his rear legs again were extremely doubtful. In her best opinion, Snowball would be a paraplegic for the rest of his life.

We talked for quite awhile about Snowball’s condition and chances of his being able to ever walk again after surgery. I asked her what other options were available. She told me that he would most likely be a paraplegic for the rest of his life and would not be able to urinate or have a bowl movement due to the fact that his bladder was extremely full (oversized). She would show me how to relieve the bladder which I would have to manually do two to three times a day. She would show me how to make his bowels move and I would have to perform this function every day. Sometimes it may require an enema.

She also mentioned that there was euthanasia.

I asked her to give me a few minutes alone with snowball while I pondered the options. I sat holding Snowball's head up in my hand because he had trouble lifting it. He tried to raise himself up to jump into my lap but he didn’t have enough strength to raise himself up to jump to me.

My thoughts were as follows:

He would be a paraplegic for the rest of his life
He would not be able to get to his food and water bowls in the kitchen
He would not be able to climb down the basement stairs to get to his litter box
He would not be able to climb up stairs from the basement
He would not be able to jump on his box next to me in the basement
He would not be able to jump in my lap again while I keyed on the PC
He would not be able to jump in my lap while I slept
He would not be able to jump on the bed where he used to sleep

Plainly and simply, he would never be able to move from any place where I manually carried him and laid him down. For the rest of his life, he would be dependent upon me to eat, drink, urinate, have a bowel movement, or be moved from room to room.

As I held Snowball’s head in my hand while he looked at me with sad eyes, I asked myself, "Is this the way you want Snowball to spend the rest of his life? Do I think Snowball wants to be a paraplegic the rest of his life and not be able to move without my help?"

When the vet came back in, I said under the circumstances, I believe euthanasia would be the most humane thing to do. I had to sign a release to put Snowball to sleep. She stated that he would be given an overdose of barbiturates which would be painless and he would fall asleep.

I held Snowball’s head in my hand and kissed him for the last time while he slept.

Friday, July 11, 2003 was overcast but was dry all day. On my way home, a light rain had fallen on my car and I knew Snowball was at peace.

Good Bye My Best and Most Faithful Friend….We loved each other the very best that we could.

 

Created by Craig Dahlke and is real...